We all have felt these feelings of rejection, because in life we don't always get what we want. Life comes with a lot of 'no's' and rejection. There will always be someone who is bigger, better and brighter than you and they get the things that you wanted. Or the even more frustrating part is when they aren't even better than you and they get that one thing you wanted. You begin to feel miserable and it's degrading. What on earth did you do wrong? Sometimes the feelings of depression come at you and you don't want to feel sad but you just do. Whether you were rejected for a job or rejected in a relationship, the feelings of pain are strong and all consuming. The painful feelings of failure are the strongest when you have given something your all, and you strongly believed that you did everything right, but it ends up falling short.
I believe that we are all here put on this earth for a purpose. Now, in pursuit of that purpose, I have seen my dream crash to the ground and be discarded. In the last year alone, I have been rejected about five times. After a while, self-doubt forms and depression hits and trying to live my everyday life just became more sad and difficult. I would cry myself to sleep thinking that I wouldn't amount to anything and I wouldn't be accepted by others. That's obviously not healthy, but I think I needed that time to let it all out and express those moments of weaknesses. It was the only way I got stronger.
In those moments, people become extremely narrow-minded. They no longer see the light at the end of the tunnel and they think they are stuck in a place they have no way of getting out of. They strongly believe there's no solution, so in that place is where they let themselves stay for a long time until it becomes the norm. I'm not going to lie, that's a really hard place to be at. You can have your friends tell you to 'think positive' and you'll hear a lifetime's worth of 'everything's going to work out in the end' but it's not going to matter because you still will not see it. It's okay to feel that way, but I'm here to tell you to persevere till the end.
The people who have stuck it out, who kept pushing through the difficult times, are the strong ones who make it on top. Everyone goes through this point in their lifetime, but it's the minds who have used it to build their story are the ones who have survived. If you give up completely at this point, it's because you are weak, you probably didn't believe in yourself to begin with or you don't care about yourself enough to pick up the pieces and try again. You can feel sorry for yourself all you want, but it isn't going to make you any better and it surely isn't going to make other people want to invest their time into you.
I'm really happy I'm no longer in that place, but I'm glad I went through it because it gave me a completely new perspective. In result, great things have happened. If you believe you will achieve greatness, I promise it will happen to you. I have come to learn that you will reach the end goal you have set out for yourself, but you probably will not get there in the way you envisioned. You feel like you know the specific path you need to take to get there, but when that path fails you think your entire goal is gone. However, if you think about working towards your dreams like climbing a spider web, not a ladder, you will have less feelings of discouragement and more optimistic feelings of continuous, persevering work.
Photograph by Chris Ozer